Ten Ways to Love Yourself Now
Hope you're having a great Wednesday! My classes at one college just finished finals. I have two more to go next Monday at the other college. These are for me bittersweet endings as we've gotten to know each other and students are on to their next adventures!
Today, writing a note on a student paper, I was advising her to be loving and kind to herself. Here is a quick list of ways to give yourself compassionate nurturing and caring. Apply liberally in all sorts of circumstances!
Unconditional Positive Regard
P.S. Humanistic psychologists would look at this as moving toward unconditional positive regard for yourself, a step toward self-actualization.
Ten Ways to Love Yourself Now
1. Sincerely tell yourself, "I love you." Put your hands on your stomach or your heart, wherever the warmth and caring of your hands would feel good. Say it a few times and let it really sink in.
2. Look into your own eyes in a mirror and tell yourself, "I love you." Go for one minute a day doing this, for about 30 days, and see what happens. At first it feels hokey, weird, untrue. If you stick with it past the uncomfortable feelings, (about a week to ten days for most people) you may be amazed at the shifts in your energy.
3. What would nurture you? What would make you feel really cared for, supported, coddled, protected? What would give you the feeling of warm blankies and delicious hot soup on a chilly day, or the inner experience of basking in the summer sun with no cares in the world? Identify two or three actions you can take often to nurture yourself -- gifts of time or small treats that uplift your spirits just because you deserve it. Do one of them now and the others really soon, and repeat often!
4. Wrap your arms around yourself and give yourself a hug!
5. Write in your journal tonight all the things you are grateful for.
6. Write a love letter to yourself, sharing all the things you most appreciate about yourself. Put it in an envelope, address it to yourself and stamp it. Give it to a trusted friend to mail to you six months from now. Or tuck it into a special book or drawer where you will surprise yourself by finding it in a few months.
7. Sit quietly and do nothing for ten minutes. (No tv, ipod, cell phone.) A cup of tea or coffee would be okay. But just sit. Breathe in and breathe out. Enjoy the stillness.
8. When you are tired, go to bed.
9. Meditate for inner answers. Stop looking for answers outside yourself. Love yourself enough to remember that the answers you seek are available within you. Practice meditation a few times a week. Start with five or ten minutes and work up to longer. (See my website, http://www.powerofpersonalpeace.com/ for many tips on how to meditate.) With practice meditating, you will begin to access and trust your own inner wisdom , a wonderful way to love yourself more deeply.
10. Speak only kind words about yourself. If you habitually make negative, self-disparaging remarks (even humorously), stop. Catch yourself and zip your lips. Then, catch the unspoken thoughts and substitute more positive ideas about yourself. When you consistently acknowledge yourself with positive remarks, your moods and expression will come to reflect an inner radiance of loving and confidence.
For instance, instead of worrying, "I'll be old, ugly and alone," tell yourself, "I'm enjoying the adventure of a lifetime, discovering who I really am and why I'm here. I'm always connected with the perfect people and situations for my upliftment, learning and growth." "As I love myself more and more, my life unfolds in its own perfection."
You deserve the best, and you are the only one who can give yourself exactly what you want. (Give yourself positive words!) As you transform negative patterns of speech, your emotions will lift and you may find yourself behaving as if you are living a happy and loving adventure!
Until next time,
Love, Light and Hugs,
Dr. Ilenya
Today, writing a note on a student paper, I was advising her to be loving and kind to herself. Here is a quick list of ways to give yourself compassionate nurturing and caring. Apply liberally in all sorts of circumstances!
Unconditional Positive Regard
P.S. Humanistic psychologists would look at this as moving toward unconditional positive regard for yourself, a step toward self-actualization.
Ten Ways to Love Yourself Now
1. Sincerely tell yourself, "I love you." Put your hands on your stomach or your heart, wherever the warmth and caring of your hands would feel good. Say it a few times and let it really sink in.
2. Look into your own eyes in a mirror and tell yourself, "I love you." Go for one minute a day doing this, for about 30 days, and see what happens. At first it feels hokey, weird, untrue. If you stick with it past the uncomfortable feelings, (about a week to ten days for most people) you may be amazed at the shifts in your energy.
3. What would nurture you? What would make you feel really cared for, supported, coddled, protected? What would give you the feeling of warm blankies and delicious hot soup on a chilly day, or the inner experience of basking in the summer sun with no cares in the world? Identify two or three actions you can take often to nurture yourself -- gifts of time or small treats that uplift your spirits just because you deserve it. Do one of them now and the others really soon, and repeat often!
4. Wrap your arms around yourself and give yourself a hug!
5. Write in your journal tonight all the things you are grateful for.
6. Write a love letter to yourself, sharing all the things you most appreciate about yourself. Put it in an envelope, address it to yourself and stamp it. Give it to a trusted friend to mail to you six months from now. Or tuck it into a special book or drawer where you will surprise yourself by finding it in a few months.
7. Sit quietly and do nothing for ten minutes. (No tv, ipod, cell phone.) A cup of tea or coffee would be okay. But just sit. Breathe in and breathe out. Enjoy the stillness.
8. When you are tired, go to bed.
9. Meditate for inner answers. Stop looking for answers outside yourself. Love yourself enough to remember that the answers you seek are available within you. Practice meditation a few times a week. Start with five or ten minutes and work up to longer. (See my website, http://www.powerofpersonalpeace.com/ for many tips on how to meditate.) With practice meditating, you will begin to access and trust your own inner wisdom , a wonderful way to love yourself more deeply.
10. Speak only kind words about yourself. If you habitually make negative, self-disparaging remarks (even humorously), stop. Catch yourself and zip your lips. Then, catch the unspoken thoughts and substitute more positive ideas about yourself. When you consistently acknowledge yourself with positive remarks, your moods and expression will come to reflect an inner radiance of loving and confidence.
For instance, instead of worrying, "I'll be old, ugly and alone," tell yourself, "I'm enjoying the adventure of a lifetime, discovering who I really am and why I'm here. I'm always connected with the perfect people and situations for my upliftment, learning and growth." "As I love myself more and more, my life unfolds in its own perfection."
You deserve the best, and you are the only one who can give yourself exactly what you want. (Give yourself positive words!) As you transform negative patterns of speech, your emotions will lift and you may find yourself behaving as if you are living a happy and loving adventure!
Until next time,
Love, Light and Hugs,
Dr. Ilenya
Labels: advice, attentional bllindness, change negative self-talk, inner answers, loving kindness, meditation, self-actualization, self-compassion, self-loving, self-nurturing, unconditional positive regard
posted by Ilenya Marrin, DSS @ 10:58 PM
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