Taking Care of You for Less Holiday Stress

Today I've been struck by the hype around the holidays,
and thought I'd share a few thoughts on how to enjoy
the holiday season with less stress, less glitz and less
frantic activity. Whew!

I live pretty simply -- very comfortably, but simply.
I don't normally watch much TV and can't imagine how
I'd ever accomplish anything if I did. So I admit I'm
biased. If you like running around in a tizzy every
December, don't bother reading further!

A couple of days ago I went for my normal walk and
passed a neighbor hanging lights on her shrubbery. We
chatted for a moment and I commented, "It's all I can do
to put up a tree every year." I made a decision years ago
to pass on the lights, to keep life a bit more simple and
sane. (All right, I'm lazy. I don't mind admiring other
people's lights, but I'm not willing to hang my own. It's
true!)

A surefire way to reduce holiday stress is to look for one
thing on your "should" list and declare it non-essential.
Scratch it out. Declare it done even if it isn't yet begun.
Give yourself permission to let it go!

Then look for a couple more things like that. Things you
have always done, perhaps, but the kids have outgrown
the custom. Or you have new in-laws now and don't need
to perpetuate this ritual. Or you never really liked it any-
way and you can decide not to do it any more just because
you don't really like it!

Next, book a couple of evenings for yourself. Especially
if you are a working mother, or a caregiver for someone
who is disabled, give yourself some "you" time during this
frenetic season when you are so focused on giving to others.
Write it into your calendar and keep that date with yourself.
It might be a date for a soak in the tub, or reading a novel
not related to the season, or a Saturday afternoon hike in
the local woods. Whatever would be relaxing and regenerating
for you. (This is not a time to catch up with girlfriends unless
you have someone who is a really good listener, who nurtures
you.)

It might even be simply a night to go to bed at 8:30
and catch up on your ZZZZs. I've managed a couple of those
early nights lately and boy do I appreciate them the next
morning!

I wouldn't suggest vegging in front of the television as a form
of relaxation. (Here's the other thing I've noticed in the last
few days!) Remember, I seldom watch TV, but recently I've
spent several evenings doing simple embroidery on gifts in
front of the screen. At first, it was cool to catch a few
episodes of crime solver shows, because I'm a long-time
mystery reader.

But after seeing about 15 episodes of a few of these shows,
I was burned out. They seem designed for creating stress in
the viewer -- more gore and excitement for jaded, seen-it-all
watchers in living rooms everywhere. You may think that just
sitting there and absorbing the action is relaxing.

It is not.

As you watch, especially the more dramatic and violent shows,
you are jerking around with mental and emotional
stress reactions almost as powerful as if you were participating
in person. If you watch a lot of television, you may be so numb
to your gut level responses that you don't realize the stress
of the process. But it is affecting you. (And if you fall asleep
while watching, the gore content goes straight into your
unconscious where it can haunt you with uneasy feelings and
weird dreams more or less indefinitely! )

So, to really relax, try listening to music, exercising, taking a
hot bath, reading something non-violent, trading massages,
giving yourself a foot rub, or working on a hobby that you love.
You might even be able to play with the kids, if you really allow
yourself to play and you don't have to constantly referee the
action.

OK. You get the idea. I'm big on taking care of yourself as a
way of maintaining your personal peace during the holiday
season.

Let me know what works for you! Either post a response on
this blog, or email me at Dr.Ilenya@powerofpersonalpeace.com.


Joy and Peace,
Dr. Ilenya

Author of e-books:
The Power of Personal Peace:
Reducing Stress by Loving Yourself from the Inside Out,
A Way of Loving Intention
and
77 Loving Steps for Success

http://www.powerofpersonalpeace.com

Copyright 2006 Dr. Ilenya Marrin. You may copy this and use it elsewhere as long
as you keep it intact.