Isn't This Fun?
Whatever it is, isn't this fun?
The frustrations come -- like having to try six times before getting the audio replay line right to get to my colleague Gabriele so she can post it for those who missed the call last Thursday (Propelling Yourself Forward)! And I still have to giggle inwardly. Thank God for all my blessings!! This adventure called life is such a -- I don't know what to call it! A remarkable experience. An amazing journey.
Cooperation is a big part of success. And loving yourself is a big part of cooperating with what is.
Lately, I'm working on loving myself as I deal with just what is present. Not that I feel a need to stick around and get hit by a falling brick, or let someone step on my toes, mind you. But if there are situations that might irritate me, I'm doing my best to love them. It's part of my strategy to stay in a loving space within myself.
A lot of the little situations that tweak my peace into imbalance are ones where I would like to be in control. Ah, yes. The master addiction, control! First of all, it's such a fallacy to think that I am in control of any situation or of any other people. Second, it's a useless struggle to try to be in control. Life just doesn't work that way. The very best I can do is some semblance of self-control and even that doesn't work all the time.
Here's how I see it working. I think I should have things my way. For instance, my husband and I often get crosswise about when to eat dinner. I'm hungry way before he is. He wants to keep playing bridge on line and I want to finish cooking and eat.
Now this seems like such a simple thing, but we have to negotiate a dinner hour anew almost every evening. Bottom line: I want him to be hungry when I am hungry. And I want to get in and out of the kitchen to go on with my other tasks. He's on a totally different time table, most of the time. His biological timer is wired differently. And he thinks hunger is an emotion and you just tell it to be quiet.
When I stay relaxed and we can easily compromise and choose a time to shoot for, I can eat a snack and wait with relative equanimity. When I let myself get too hungry, or when I forget to hold my viewpoint as an observer, I start trying to control the situation and my husband. Being equally as hard-headed as me, he let's me know right away that isn't a good option. And we get cross and cranky and sometimes go on to be irritated about more things! My little habitual-pattern attempt to control can escalate into a full scale argument if we're not careful!
So, recently, my inner dialogue goes something like this.
"There he (or she or it) goes again. Yes, I'm judging this."
"Ah, but we said we'd love it all."
"I know. I'm working on it."
"So, let's focus on just loving me working on loving the situation."
"Sure. This must be just perfect in some way because it is what is. It's all a part of God. So I'm asking for help to accept what is without judging. And on loving myself even if I'm judging."
I find that even writing about my control pattern takes me back into the energy of judging and being out of balance, stressed, unhappy with what is.
But when I read my little inner dialogue, I start to muse about the wacky lessons of life and my joy just starts to bubble up inwardly. I start to smile, I start to feel good again. Peace is present.
It's a choice as to where I place my focus. I don't have to like the dinner control struggle that we play out repeatedly, but I can love myself, love my husband, and extend my loving to our process. I can choose to stay in my personal peace. This spells success on many levels!
So, I'm back to working on posting my audio file -- attempt number seven coming up.
Meanwhile, as always,
I'm wishing you joy, peace, loving, success and inner giggles!
Dr. Ilenya
Ilenya Marrin, DSS
Author of ebooks: The Power of Personal Peace:
Reducing Stress by Loving Yourself from the Inside Out
and
A Way of Loving Intention
http://www.powerofpersonalpeace.com
ilenya@powerofpersonalpeace.com
The frustrations come -- like having to try six times before getting the audio replay line right to get to my colleague Gabriele so she can post it for those who missed the call last Thursday (Propelling Yourself Forward)! And I still have to giggle inwardly. Thank God for all my blessings!! This adventure called life is such a -- I don't know what to call it! A remarkable experience. An amazing journey.
Cooperation is a big part of success. And loving yourself is a big part of cooperating with what is.
Lately, I'm working on loving myself as I deal with just what is present. Not that I feel a need to stick around and get hit by a falling brick, or let someone step on my toes, mind you. But if there are situations that might irritate me, I'm doing my best to love them. It's part of my strategy to stay in a loving space within myself.
A lot of the little situations that tweak my peace into imbalance are ones where I would like to be in control. Ah, yes. The master addiction, control! First of all, it's such a fallacy to think that I am in control of any situation or of any other people. Second, it's a useless struggle to try to be in control. Life just doesn't work that way. The very best I can do is some semblance of self-control and even that doesn't work all the time.
Here's how I see it working. I think I should have things my way. For instance, my husband and I often get crosswise about when to eat dinner. I'm hungry way before he is. He wants to keep playing bridge on line and I want to finish cooking and eat.
Now this seems like such a simple thing, but we have to negotiate a dinner hour anew almost every evening. Bottom line: I want him to be hungry when I am hungry. And I want to get in and out of the kitchen to go on with my other tasks. He's on a totally different time table, most of the time. His biological timer is wired differently. And he thinks hunger is an emotion and you just tell it to be quiet.
When I stay relaxed and we can easily compromise and choose a time to shoot for, I can eat a snack and wait with relative equanimity. When I let myself get too hungry, or when I forget to hold my viewpoint as an observer, I start trying to control the situation and my husband. Being equally as hard-headed as me, he let's me know right away that isn't a good option. And we get cross and cranky and sometimes go on to be irritated about more things! My little habitual-pattern attempt to control can escalate into a full scale argument if we're not careful!
So, recently, my inner dialogue goes something like this.
"There he (or she or it) goes again. Yes, I'm judging this."
"Ah, but we said we'd love it all."
"I know. I'm working on it."
"So, let's focus on just loving me working on loving the situation."
"Sure. This must be just perfect in some way because it is what is. It's all a part of God. So I'm asking for help to accept what is without judging. And on loving myself even if I'm judging."
I find that even writing about my control pattern takes me back into the energy of judging and being out of balance, stressed, unhappy with what is.
But when I read my little inner dialogue, I start to muse about the wacky lessons of life and my joy just starts to bubble up inwardly. I start to smile, I start to feel good again. Peace is present.
It's a choice as to where I place my focus. I don't have to like the dinner control struggle that we play out repeatedly, but I can love myself, love my husband, and extend my loving to our process. I can choose to stay in my personal peace. This spells success on many levels!
So, I'm back to working on posting my audio file -- attempt number seven coming up.
Meanwhile, as always,
I'm wishing you joy, peace, loving, success and inner giggles!
Dr. Ilenya
Ilenya Marrin, DSS
Author of ebooks: The Power of Personal Peace:
Reducing Stress by Loving Yourself from the Inside Out
and
A Way of Loving Intention
http://www.powerofpersonalpeace.com
ilenya@powerofpersonalpeace.com
posted by Ilenya Marrin, DSS @ 10:35 PM
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